Britney Spears & Jada Pinkett Smith -DOTM044

Britney Spears, Rock Star

“Sometimes it’s our secrets that define us.”

Secrets are usually things you don’t want others to know about. Hiding the

truth changes everything. Most of the time it is not even something that is

so horrible that others would shun us or want us dead.

It is surprising to learn that many times the things we worry about most

don’t really concern others very much. It changes our behavior because of our

level of worry, but in the big scheme of things it is actually kind of small.

But there are other types of secrets that can influence your behavior.

Consider this quote:

“A man’s true secrets are more secret to himself than they are to others.”

Paul Valery

There are little subconscious influencers we all live by that we don’t think

of as secret, but we still use them to make decisions. Interestingly enough,

these things are many times known about us by the rest of the world. If we

shouted it from the mountaintops, they would be no more public and obvious

than they are now.

The roots of these things are in life changing experiences we had when we

were younger. Did you ever stick your finger in a light socket or a fire when

you were small? Lesson learned. There are plenty of good lessons that we are

not conscious of that rule us every day.

Then there is that other category. I know a lady whose father spent most of

his time telling her what she thought was worthless, and she didn’t have any

business saying anything at all. Even when she is not directly thinking of

it, actually, ESPECIALLY when she is not thinking of it, this rules her

thoughts and actions.

Physical assault is addressed in law. Mental assault, not so much. Damage is

caused by the little secrets placed in the subconscious minds of unsuspecting

children. This can be by parents, teachers and other kids. Even trusted

authority figures can do serious life long harm to the mind of a child simply

by not being careful in what they say.

Be careful not to cause this type of mental damage with your negligence, and

definitely don’t cause it intentionally. We all know people who have

interesting phobias that we can see, but are completely hidden and secret to

the person in question.

As my friend Jan says, take a gentle path through life. Many times it is

better to leave things undisturbed than to mess them up. Just be considerate

and nice. It is as simple as that.


Jada Pinkett Smith, Actress and Singer

“Lack of confidence is what makes you want to change somebody else’s mind. When you’re OK, you don’t need to convince anyone else in order to empower yourself.”

Imagine someone you don’t particularly care for is wrong about something.

Just flat wrong. I don’t mean something that is likely to get them killed. I

don’t mean something that is going to negatively affect you or those you

love. But all the same, you feel the insatiable desire to set them straight.

It seems they are not really the one with the problem after all. Isn’t it the

right of everyone to wrong if they decide that is what they want to think?

You are totally convinced of the righteous rightness of your position, but

who elected you king so that your will must be obeyed instead of letting them

control their own destiny?

I think a lot of times it is our fear of being proven wrong that makes us

loudly proclaim our rightness in such an arrogant fashion. We would be

mortified to find we really were wrong, and we try to make our position so

loud that we can hopefully intimidate them into not challenging us.

Of course if they do challenge us, then the fall from grace is started from a

much higher altitude. It is also a much louder and much more public thud when

you crash and burn.

There used to be a game show back in the 70’s called Rhyme and Reason. It

required celebrities to make up rhymes on the spot, many times with hilarious


My favorite regular actor on the show was Nipsey Russel. He was so good at

it, that they always had him to make up a rhyme at the end of the show to

give some good advice to the fans those watching. You know, a thought to take

with them for the week. Kind of like this show. (hint, hint)

My favorite one I heard Mr. Russel say was this:

“Be careful of the words you say to keep them soft and sweet. You never know

from day to day which ones you’ll have to eat.”

If lives are in peril over the situation, then press forward and convince

that person what needs to be done to save lives. There are few situations

that don’t involve life saving that are so important that your ego can’t take

a small vacation and let the other person continue the thoughts that make

them comfortable. You know, kind of like the way you like to feel about your

own thoughts.

Simply put, let it go. Surely you can do that every now and then.


Some special “Thanks” are in order for Dana McDonald who gave us the use of a

very nice studio condenser microphone, and Dana Tucker who donated a mixing

console that will enable us to capture telephone interviews for the other show I do with my wife Dee, The WV Podcast.

Dana Tucker has also interviewed Dee for his own podcast, Podcasters Blog.

The subject is the complications that can occur when trying to record an

internet radio show with Sjogren’s Disease and other autoimmune disorders.

You can check out the show notes for links on episode 4 of the WV Podcast.

They will also be included in the show notes for episode 44 of Daggers Of The


Thank you so much for listening. Links to subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher,

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